"SHORT BACK AND SIDES, SIR? MADAM?"

A visit to the hairdresser by a visitor to Thailand can be a pleasure or a pain. It all depends on how you ask for what you want, explains Ajaan Wiyada Kantarod.

At home in your own country, a visit to the hairdresser is so commonplace that there may seldom be much communication, let alone errors. This is particularly true with middle aged and older men who like the same cut from the same hairdresser every visit. But change the scene to Thailand, add the wide varieties that women often seek in the salon, stir in linguistic problems and cultural differences - and you have a minefield of potential misunderstanding!

"I hate electric clippers. I've hated them as long as I can remember. I sat in the salon and said very clearly 'NO clippers'! Next thing I hear is that awful high pitched whining noise! I jumped out of that chair and just ran!" American visitor.

"I have a good head of hair and a full beard. It all grows easily except the bits on the temples which connect the two, so they don't need to be cut on every visit. I went to a new hairdresser and took an interpreter who explained this carefully. The very first thing the woman did with the clippers was lop off all the hair over one temple! I couldn't believe it! I had to let her do the other side to even it up - and it took two months to grow back!" British resident.

"I like my hair really short and told the hairdresser to cut off a lot. She went round doing a very light cut and seemed to be finishing off. I asked her to cut off much more. Again she went around and took off a tiny amount more. Again I emphasised I wanted it short and used my fingers to demonstrate. She shook her head, put away her scissors and fled behind the scenes. She just refused to do as I asked!" American woman visitor.

Why do people have these problems? When you show a great dislike for something, or go to the trouble of using an interpreter, or mime your needs - how can things still go wrong?

The answer is a mixture of linguistic mis-understanding, cultural differences and - with many hairdressers - a strong in-built feeling that their formal training over-rules the request(s) the client seems to be making!

Let me say right away that NONE of the complaints we've heard about stemmed from the businesses we visited for this feature. Good English is spoken at them all and none of them can remember difficulties in understanding clients' needs. But some important clues did emerge as we spoke to them - and to frustrated former clients of other salons. So let's see how we can help you, the person in the chair, to get it RIGHT FIRST TIME!

GET BY IN THAI!

Whether you are a man paying 120b for a simple shampoo and cut, or a woman paying up to 4,000b for a perm with highlights, here are the phrases to help you - and the hairdresser - succeed:

Clippers

Perhaps the first man we mentioned had been hurt by a clumsy barber when he was a young boy? That could have been really painful and I don't blame him for having a phobia, even if he doesn't remember why. Actually, following the recent spread of fears about HIV blood infections, two salons told us that many clients now refuse the use of electric clippers due to possible danger from accidental cuts or grazes. Of course all reputable salons keep their equipment clinically clean as well as having the skill to avoid mishaps. But it's human nature that facts don't always overcome fears - so the professional has to go along with demand and often leave the clippers alone.

Facial hair

Culturally, Thais associate male cleanliness with being clean-shaven and, as you'll notice, very few Thai men wear moustaches or beards. So, many men's hairdressers are reluctant to simply trim beards and are much more likely to want to shave them off completely! Even if they avoid that temptation, there may be a strong inner urge to seperate the hair of the head from the hair of the beard. I don't know if that was the cause of our second man's problem, or whether the interpreter didn't speak clearly enough, but I'm tempted to believe the former because of what follows.....

Cutting it short

Our Australian lady had her hairdresser actually walk (run?) off the job rather than cut off the amount she wanted. That is quite a strong statement in any culture and our inquiries seem to show that this, like the male temple-hair-cutting incident above, is a case of mind over matter. What is in the hairdresser's mind matters more than what the client has requested!

Hard to understand, perhaps, but just put yourself in the place of the other person. You work hard to get your professional qualifications; you are taught to do certain jobs in certain ways to achieve certain pre-conceived results; then you get the job you've always wanted. And along comes a foreigner who demands that you break all the rules! Not easy!!

When a western man sits down in front of the big mirror he will usually ask the hairdresser to "cut off a lot" or "only cut off a little". But a Thai haidresser is used to hearing a Thai man say "please leave only a little" or "leave a lot on". A really big minefield, this one!

What's wrong with Wednesdays?

Have you been frustrated by the fact that so many hairdressers seem to close on Wednesdays? It's a fact and stems from a very old Thai superstition that it's bad luck to cut your hair OR your finger nails or toe nails on a Wednesday! Superstitions are passed down through families in every culture; they can be very strong and should be respected even if they are not fully understood. Of the salons we visited, AIM is closed on Wednesdays but Nina and Hair Decor remain open. Freedom of choice, folks!

Stay alert!

The rules for getting your hair done properly are exactly the same as we've printed before for getting a good massage.

Firstly, talk as fully as possible to the provider of the service to describe what you want - and don't hesitate to use mime if you run out of words. Thai people love to have fun and this can relax both parties and help provide positive results.

Secondly, no matter how very relaxing it may feel, do stay awake and be aware of what's going on. Just as you can contribute to your own good massage, you can help direct what's happening to your hair. Ask for the comb or scissors and demonstrate if need be. Stay smiley, bright and polite and there will be no loss of face - or excess hair for that matter!

LET'S SPEAK THAI!

-No 1: At the hair dresser

Aj Wiyada Kantarod

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